Premature Infatuation – Making it last…

Image: https://mysoulsonice.wordpress.com

Don’t you just love that feeling that you get when you first meet someone that sparks your interest? Yes! A spark is what ignites the flame, it’s like this burning want to know everything that you could possibly know about this new fascinating being that has been introduced into your life. The high is better than any drug that you can ever imagine, it’s the best- its natural, raw and selfless and you want to hold them till you can feel their heartbeat and yours as one. It’s like you want to lap it all up and their very existence and flow in it. From being together partying, gushing over how you met to every friend or stranger that you meet and making it the most important thing to know so that the person has nothing but to listen to you like their life depended on it.

Eyes locked across the room like no one else exists, not leaving their hand for fear of losing them for that moment that could bring you immeasurable pain that you couldn’t possibly survive.

 Give it 3 months or 6 or maybe a year and then you start noticing the human-ness of this unicorn that was – it has gradually deteriorated into a horse and now all it seems is like a hybrid between a donkey and something that resembled a pony at some point. Things like the laundry isn’t done and it’s all over the place or that they still haven’t deleted that godforsaken Tinder app or that you’ve been waiting all night when they’ve been out partying when you clearly didn’t want to go out assuming that they would get the hint and stay home and spend ‘quality’ time with you without your mentioning it.

Because hello? Isn’t he/she supposed to be your soul mate and they can hear the voice of your soul? (OK I’m dying laughing right now because this is really sounding like a nightmare! I’ve been there and I’m sure so have you) obviously, the ray of sunshine has now become a bane of your existence.

The constant calls, the insecurities, the wants, the dislikes, the turn offs, the fact that now you can’t praise the opposite sex around the same guy who said “babe I’m cool with everything”. Questions like – how could you go out and not answer your phone for the last 3 hours? And who is that girl in the back of your picture? (It’s probably a photobomb but who cares?) Or that guy was totally checking you out and you let him? When some time ago he would have probably walked up to the guy and said “appreciate my asset cos you can’t have it” with a wink

Its over. The honeymoon phase is O-V-E-R

Then it boils down to how do we keep this alive? Is it over or can we make it through this and I’ll do the laundry and he can probably fold the clothes. Are we reaching that ugly part where we get this sick satisfaction from seeing the other partner in pain with the games, the lying, the jealousy because that’s the only sadist satisfaction that you get from knowing that they still care about you? It’s just a very sad state of affairs, so this is when you know that this beautiful surreal existence has now become the start of a fairy-tale that you never imagined, when your stories now start with this phrase when you talk about each other fondly – Once upon a time a long long time ago….

It’s time to decide honey – quit it or win it?

Exes are Hexes

Image: weheartit.com

I have a very simple ideology when it comes to exes – PRESS DELETE.

 (only for adult relationships past high school!)

It’s super difficult to do but one press of a button and it’s over and it HAS to be all rounded like its laser hair removal. You never want that sh** to grow back.

DELETE the number (I have really embarrassing stories of people who get wasted and call, send pictures and messages that they wake up regretting. Like how Rohan obv. name changed, this friend sent a snapchat to an ex and we all know that you can’t take back snapchats) there is a reason why they are your ex, because things didn’t work out in the first place right?

Hope is my least favorite word and I hope it becomes yours too when it refers to an ex.

DELETE all of their social media connections to you which means untagging them and deleting pictures where you don’t look that great anymore (cos seriously there is no one to compromise for anymore). You don’t need a constant reminder to tell you that this is the next thing that they’re chilling with and this is the new bae – HELL to the NO! Plus it saves you from internal embarrassment when you’re secretly stalking them, or writing statuses that are super emo (emotional) and people judge you as a drama queen for.

Killswitch can help you get rid of what’s not necessary on Facebook, Designated Dialer creates a list of numbers to not call and blocks them when you get home late at night . So start over and enjoy the attention that comes your way when you travel light (i.e. no baggage)

Well if you see them, do the curt nod or run in the opposite direction because nothing good is coming out of it if you’re going to make conversation – I’ve switched places a couple of times when I saw a former ex – one psycho and one not so much. The wasted psycho tried to throw something when he saw me with the new bae over the 2nd floor of a club (well the new bae was way hotter ha ha in your face!) but the second one was alright but it was too soon for me to have stuck around and waited for things to get worse as we got wasted and who knows what would have happened but I’m sure it would include REGRET with a hangover.

Hooking up helps, seriously! Try Tinder, thrill, OKCupid and Woo and find people that are non-creepy.

Yes! it’s a little bit of work but

1. It’ll keep you busy
2. Flirting and getting attention makes you feel good about yourself.

Who knows you could be someone’s Tinderella and in the bargain find your next straight or gay prince charming (It’s a free world)

I have some crazy stories coming up on tinder and dating apps (priceless experiences so watch this space for more!)

Get it Honey!!

Image :@ShaneBitney on twitter

Hi you gorgeous people! OK not all of you just the gorgeous ones (keep reading if you sense the sarcasm)

Monogamy seems to be the new monotony? (Well, it’s been a while since I’ve been single). Disney lied! That’s why they never show us the sequels – did prince charming turn out to be gay? (Come on he’s too pretty to function!) Or cheat? Or did snow white get a divorce and decide polygamy was a better deal with the dwarfs? You could either judge me for being a blunt as***le or agree with me and share your experiences so my friends and I (we’re 20 somethings or a little older) can feel like we’re not the only ones who are struggling.

In short, I’ve been dating since middle school (much to the chagrin of my parents) I blame puberty! And so it begins…

Wait for it…. I’ll get more into deets towards the rest of the posts and how it panned out.

This blog is purely about navigating through the many waves of seeing people apps, online and offline – the good, the bad and the shady for my friends and I. The complexities are abundant and there is a lot to talk about. Believe me it is not as glamorous as it sounds but it’s not ranting or complaining I promise!  It’s a humorous take on our stories of the sad, the hilarity, the bad decisions, the spontaneity, booty calls etc. you name it.

I hope that the stories are interesting enough so you could share yours too and get featured (no emo stories please let’s keep it a bit crass yet funny yet chill).

 But! This is also my way of allowing you to have a glimpse of what it’s like to be single in the city in the 21^st century in India.

Enjoy my ride guys and hang tight!